26 April 2005

A Great Question...

So, a friend at work e-mailed me today with a great question:
What do you think is the balance of being honest with someone when they say, “How are you?” I truly believe that even in the midst of struggles, we should have joy, and should not be pessimistic or negative. But I also feel strongly that, as Christ-followers, we should be authentic. What do we say when someone asks that and means it?

I rambled on for a few minutes with an answer, but I still feel like I could discuss this for days or years...and never know how to truly be authentic and joyful all the time:
That is a great question…one I struggle with practically every day of my life. I never know what to do…even in the small encounters of life. What do I say on Sunday mornings at church? (Reason #764 I hate “meet and greet” time) What if I don’t feel good or even feel like smiling when I am at work? I really am pretty happy most of the time, but when I am bummed, I am way bummed. But, that doesn’t mean I have lost all faith in Christ. And, I don’t want to sound “religious” with “I am having a tough day, but God is still good” as a response, even though that is probably the most honest I could be in many situations. During the times when I am struggling with my faith and purpose, I think it is the hardest to be authentic because I don’t want people to know that I am struggling with that, but how many people in my life really want to know that I am struggling with that…four or five? But, those also pose the greatest opportunities to share our journey with someone else or even encourage someone else without ever knowing it. Even though I don’t do it well, I think it is important to think of some great things that God is doing…kind of like a fall back tank. For example, sometimes there are specific things that really frustrate me...and Buck knows it; but when he asks me I don't want to just complain some more. So, now when Buck asks me about my feelings toward certain subjects (someone whom I know wants authenticity) I can HONESTLY say what I am struggling with, but point out what God is doing in my life at the same time. Does that make sense? I am REALLY trying to do that as far as this new transition in my life goes…but that still brings us back to the everyday generic, “how are you?” question we hate. I think we have to trust God…that we will have joy in the encounters that need joy, but that we would be real with our struggles, our bad days when an opportunity to let everything out (in a healthy way, of course) arises. It all goes back to being lead by the Holy Spirit. I think that will be hard for me as long as I live. I think we know when God provides us with the opportunity to grow by sharing, to feel better by crying for a little while, to dig into His Word, and/or to encourage others through our struggles. I also think we know when a smile is needed. If deep inside of us we do have the joy of Christ, then smiling or saying we are good is authentic. Sometimes we have to share the joy even when we don’t feel like it. I don’t know if that makes any sense…just a bunch of ramblings.

If you have any thoughts on the subject let me know.

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